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running....running.....

Mon Nov 2, 2009, 8:28 AM
i have officially passed the 6500 number for views here.... huzzah!

so, update.... um.... i'm in texas now....day 17 to be exact. job interview tonight. cross your fingers for me, k?

things are going on behind the scenes that i do not know what are but are apparently good. wish i knew though....

what else..... getting used to the area....traffic here is different than what i'm used to but i'm easing into it.

let's see..... i'm hoping to have reference material for my next art project..... once i get my room manageable again. there's a lot of boxes piled in there right now.

trying to write stories... including a new fruits basket fan fic.... on page 11 there.... what else... what else...

if you are into anime, check out okunenanime.com. the site is just getting back up and on its legs after the stupid server killed it so we're basics at the moment but the forum is amazing. we're currently roleplaying ouran high school host club so if you're interested in joining us, do come and play.....

and i think that's about it. for now at any rate.

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Fireflies!
  • Reading: skip beat!
  • Watching: skip beat!
  • Playing: Fireflies!
  • Eating: hershey kisses

"everything is never as it seems" - Fire

Thu Oct 22, 2009, 5:16 PM
"Everything is never as it seems". i truly believe that. how is it that a perfect song, such as this, could be created? seriously! it's AMAZING! and if you haven't heard it, i have it on my play list on my profile. and i'm suddenly craving apples.... random!

so, thoughts.... what are my thoughts for tonight? well, things tend to be unlike what they seem a lot. how interesting is that? i seem like i'm younger than i am. some people seem more sincere than they are. others seem more perfect than they are, or not as broken inside as they are. some seem stronger than they are. some seem weaker than they are. it's an interesting thing that you can't judge a book by its cover because it's usually not the most accurate view of what's inside, and everyone will see something different no matter what they're looking at. isn't that amazing?

i can write a poem about an apple with a worm inside that someone accidentally eats and someone can interpret that as an erotic poem about sex. well, everyone's entitled to their own view. it's part of their perspective, how they view the world, the specific prescription of rose colored classes given them by experience, and it affects everything they do and see or hear, feel, touch, etc. it's something i've definitely noticed. and experiences from childhood, no matter how long ago that may or may not be, will influence you as you get older, no matter how much you may try to get away from it. it's just the way it is. it's part of who you are. you don't have to rely on it, but denying it happened won't help you either. it is a part of who you are, no matter how small a part.

it's just like when i say that every person i meet has a place in my heart. how big of a piece depends on how well and how long i know them. but anyone who i have spent any semblance of quality time with is someone i will remember. and each person i meet, under whatever circumstances, will slightly change my perspective on life, be it for good or ill. that's what we're here for, to open up horizons for each other. we have to work together to have a truly clear vision of the world. that's why we're not meant to be alone. sometimes it just takes a while to find that other part of us that we're missing. and sometimes we don't' even realize that we're missing it. sometimes we compromise and only partially fill that space. it happens all the time.

but, "everything is never as it seems". usually, patience, perseverance, and hope reveal the truth behind all things. that's the way it is. if you want something truly worth having, you have to work at it. be patient. hope. dream. persevere. hang in there. hold on and don't let go. if it's truly worth having, don't give up. anything is possible. life has taught me that. nothing is as it seems.

did you now that people who do something creative every day tend to live longer,healthier lives? not only that, but their minds stay sharp longer. try something new every day. do something creative. write. sing, paint. draw. throw pots. not literally. ceramics.

we often sell ourselves short, i've noticed. we put ourselves down. we say silly things like "i'm not worth it" or "i can't do it". we trick ourselves into believing those things, then the problems start. we lose confidence in ourselves and those around us. well.... i guess we can do that if we really want to, or we can choose to believe that we have potential to do great things, to be something great. we don't' have to change the world, just a small part of it. and sometimes that small part is just ourselves. if we can do that, see the good instead of the bad, i'd say that's a pretty big accomplishment.


"cuz i get a thousand hugs from ten thousand lightning bugs as they try to teach me how to dance."

here's another question for you. how often do we think about the little things? i mean the ones we usually take for granted, like little earth worms and lady bugs, flower petals, a cool breeze, the scent of freshly mowed grass. or, how about jelly beans. carrots. chairs. beds. kids. friends. cars. fireflies. stars. the night sky. lights. sun. moon. and how about chocolate chips? or time spent enjoying life?
how come we often overlook the simple things that make us happy? it's like we don't believe they can, that we can't be happy unless we have the big, complicated things that don't equal happiness. we're looking too far from the target, in a way. it's the simple things that really bring happiness. it really is. don't believe me? just ask someone what makes them happy. it's probably not the really expensive ring you gave them, but the thought behind it. it's what it represents, which is likely something not tangible, something you can only feel inside. now how is that for amazing?

did you know that you actually get the most satisfaction from life by helping others? there's just no way you can't feel good about yourself if you're truly helping someone else. just try it and see for yourself. if you are doing it truly to help another, there is no way you can't feel good about yourself. it almost makes doing service sound selfish, doesn't it? oh well. maybe service is selfish. but i do know that i'm never happier than when i'm sharing love with someone, not seeing to be loved. and that, my friends, makes a big different.
you may give kudos to Jerry for saying it before me. when you are in the whole dating scene "are you looking for someone to love or are you looking for someone to love you?" not exact quote but basic gist. he's a very wise guy. i think it applies in so many ways, not just in "romantic" love. when you are doing something, are you looking at it for your own benefit or for the benefit of the whole? interesting concept, no?

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: Fireflies!
  • Reading: skip beat!
  • Watching: gunslinger girl 2
  • Playing: Fireflies!
  • Eating: hershey kisses

moved

Tue Oct 20, 2009, 5:53 AM
just as an fyi.... since i haven't posted it previously. i have moved. i no longer reside in utah, but in texas. you can find me in the greater Dallas/Fort Worth area, if you know where to look. which means more convention opportunities and lots of confusion for me until i get used to a metropolis vs. rural community i'm used to.

so, if you don't see me around a lot for a bit, it's only because i've lost myself out here in texas but will eventually find myself again.

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: the wind
  • Reading: detective conan
  • Watching: Inuyasha
  • Playing: windows media player...music!
  • Eating: fudge stripes cookies!

on this day in history.....

Sun Sep 27, 2009, 6:34 AM
1540

Pope Paul III approved the charter for the Society of Jesus (Jesuits), founded by St. Ignatius Loyola.
1939

Warsaw, Poland, was surrendered to the Nazis after weeks of resistance.
1959

Typhoon Vera battered the Japanese island of Honshu, killing almost 5,000 people.
1964

The Warren Commission report concluded that there was no conspiracy in the assassination of President John F. Kennedy; Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.
1998

Mark McGwire hit his record-setting 69th and 70th home runs in the last game of the regular season.

and i was born! tis my birthday everyone!

oh yeah, i started my third fruits basket fan fiction today. currently on page two... yay!

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: the wind
  • Reading: detective conan
  • Watching: Inuyasha
  • Playing: windows media player...music!
  • Eating: fudge stripes cookies!

la la la

Tue Sep 8, 2009, 5:52 PM
hey all. went to anime vegas over the weekend. wasn't as big as i thought it would be but it sure was fun. i got to meet a lot of new peeps, take pics, see cool stuff, bought my first wall scroll ever.... really fun fun fun....

and hopefully things will work in favor of what i'm trying to do now. i've applied to like fifteen-odd jobs and am crossing fingers that something good will come of all that so cross fingers, prayer, whatever you feel is good for me! please! i really don't want to do fast food anymore. ten plus years is long enough, don't you think?

  • Mood: Tired
  • Listening to: the wind
  • Reading: detective conan
  • Watching: Inuyasha
  • Playing: windows media player...music!
  • Eating: fudge stripes cookies!

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